| Instinctively, we all base our perceptions of others | | | | Positivity can calm negativity like a reset button. |
| by what we first see. But that isn't where the | | | | Keep transforming the negative into a blessing or |
| real attraction lay. Sure, you can live in the | | | | opportunity as the challenges arise daily. Strive to |
| trendiest neighborhood, have multiple homes | | | | see the light and buoyant positivity in the situation |
| around the world, have the ultimate job, the | | | | at hand. Positivity sparkles with good feelings |
| sexiest life, make millions of dollars, go on exotic | | | | drawing others toward you. |
| vacations, and dud yourself out with eclectic style. | | | | 5. Believe in yourself and gain confidence. |
| But if you haven't developed a magnetic mindset | | | | Confidence is the secret sauce to success and |
| you probably have a zero personality and even | | | | the can-do attitude. Being confident makes you |
| fewer friends. | | | | more likely to find other confident and successful |
| Here are some simple ways to amp your | | | | people. This will not only open up new |
| attraction meter ratings to something a little | | | | opportunities, but you will also find that your own |
| better: | | | | goals and plans will start to become bigger and |
| 1. Lead a flourishing life. This is the most powerful | | | | you'll be capable of pushing relentlessly working to |
| attraction factor by far: create more, be more, | | | | achieve more. In time you will gradually exude |
| do more, grow more, have more, give more | | | | more self-assurance and a stronger belief in |
| freely in every areas of your life rather than | | | | yourself. Keep it all in check so you don't morph |
| struggle and react like a victim of circumstance. | | | | into an arrogant Superman complex. |
| It's that simple. | | | | 6. Make long-term friendships. A long-term |
| 2. Be real, but then keep growing. Stop social | | | | relationship is based on love, intimacy, passion and |
| modeling by imitating images you see in the | | | | commitment. The intimacy portion of love is that |
| media. Oscar Wilde puts it succinctly, 'Be yourself; | | | | of friends; you enjoy spending time together, and |
| everyone else is already taken.' Forgive and | | | | have grown rather close strictly within the realms |
| accept your past, your shortcomings and where | | | | of "personality attraction." Although physical |
| you have failed with others. Fix those areas one | | | | attraction is necessary in any relationship, this |
| by one. See your own goodness and beauty. Build | | | | feeling does not need to be acted upon right |
| it out. Take a piece of paper and write down all | | | | away without full fulfillment of the intimacy |
| of your characteristics you can think of, both | | | | aspect. The passion and fire aspect of attraction |
| good and bad. Be brutally honest. Then take | | | | can attribute to many distortions and relationship |
| another piece of paper and write down all of the | | | | losses. For example, if you rush head-first into |
| characteristics you want to have-in other words, | | | | passion without considering the needs of a new |
| draw the picture of who you want be. Let go of | | | | friend, somebody is going to end up hurt. Rushing |
| the things on the first list, and start taking actions | | | | screams neediness and an attitude that "it's all |
| to become the person you want to be. | | | | about me", not the long-term friendship. The final, |
| 3. Show genuine interest in others by listening. | | | | and equally important, aspect of making long-term |
| Two ears, but only one mouth. The other person | | | | friendships work is that of commitment. The |
| is trying to convey a message to you. Stop | | | | conscious choice to remain with this person for an |
| waiting for a pause in the conversation to inject | | | | extended portion of time. |
| your personal opinion. Listen to understand, not to | | | | 7. Be a nicer person and become a little |
| respond. It's okay to check in to keep the flow of | | | | Mensch-kin. Mensch is a Yiddish word that |
| the conversation going, or to repeat a thought | | | | connotes a person who is admired, respected, |
| back. It demonstrates that you are paying | | | | and trusted because of a sense of ethics, |
| attention. Every counselor knows that one of the | | | | fairness, and nobility. Do something really nice for |
| basic needs of a person is to be heard. The | | | | someone you know, but altruistically, with no |
| peace that comes knowing someone cares | | | | intention of ever having the favor returned. Be |
| enough to listen to them intently. Be that person. | | | | sure you do it to sincerely help them and not just |
| Sit attentively. Really listen so the other person | | | | to position yourself in their good graces. |
| will eventually get his/her thoughts across to you. | | | | If everything else is too much, well then just |
| 4. Stop complaining. No one wants to be around a | | | | smile more to become a people magnet. Smile |
| human complaint department. Confide in the | | | | because you're thankful. Smile because you are |
| person that can actually help you solve your | | | | blessed. Smile because you know you have |
| problem. Broadcasting your ills to the world will kill | | | | something positive to give back to the world. |
| your personal Nielson ratings and cancel your | | | | Smile just because you can. |
| show-and your sales. Work on being positive. | | | | |